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    February 23

    出门处处是杀机

     友情提示:打开音响待音乐响起后观看本文效果更佳
     
     出门会不会被树叶砸中头部身亡?不会!因为在此之前也许你已经被流星砸死了 或是被正在做菜的大妈扔下的菜叶砸成脑震荡
     
      出门是很危险的!下面是血与泪的控诉TATATATATATATATAT:
    事件一:在路边边走边发短信,不觉中已经走在自行车道上,无奈只好走到十字路口,正欲绕进人行道,不期蜜蜂飞入领口,大骇,伸手挠之,手机飞,落于路面之上,飞身拾之,是时有车疾驶而来,幸而擦身而过,免于一死;
     
    事件二:捡回手机,顿觉饥饿,骤见汤包小馆一,遂入,下面发生的情况,真他妈太惨无人道了,已经不是文言文能够表达的了,那馄饨里竟能吃出牛皮筋,@#$%,昏死过去;
     
    事件三:昏厥过后,醒时已黄昏,又觉饥饿,得一知味观而入,夹一小笼正欲入口,我靠,上面竟有一只死蚊子```````````````````
     
     
     
    于是,老子今天要血洗杭州,嗷嗷嗷嗷嗷嗷啊
     
    于是,HTV-3,21:00,"大家好,欢迎收看我和你说,今天先要同大家讲讲一个小伙子在知味观吃夜饭时突然发疯连续砍杀数十人````"
     
    于是,HTV-2,21:30,"朋友们晚上好,欢迎你收看阿六头说新闻,我是安峰.今朝夜快边啦,有个小伙子来动知味观吃了只小笼以后突然发狂,真当作孽啦,连牢斩死几十个无辜市民啦```"
     
     
    `````````````````````````````````````````````
     
    背景音乐响起,
     
    "血染盔甲 我挥泪杀 
     
    满城菊花 谁的天下 
     
    杭州城里 狼烟风沙 
     
    生死不过 一只小笼`````"

    Comments (2)

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    suwen xiewrote:
    小昕的搞笑水平真不是盖的!
    Feb. 25
    lijia yuwrote:
    打开了音响了,怎么一点效果都没有?/`~
    遭遇倒是值得同情的!
    想问下,你被蜜蜂蜇了吗?
    Feb. 24

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